"Are You For Surreal?" (Thus Spake Putney)

(Article appearing on p.32 of "The N.Y. Daily News" of Wed., Nov. 3, 2004)

CANADA KEMOSABE RULING HAS A HI-HO SILVER LINING

Dateline: Ottawa, Ont., Canada-

The courts have ruled: Kemosabe is not a racist term, at least not in Canada.

Judges took up the issue after a native Canadian woman complained that her boss created a poisoned work environment by calling her Kemosabe, the name given to the Lone Ranger by his friend Tonto in the 1950s TV Western "The Lone Ranger."

The manager of a secondhand sports store in Sydney, Nova Scotia, argued that Kemosabe was a term he used to address customers as well as employees.

The court ruling last week confirmed a decision by a Nova Scotia Human Rights Commission board of inquiry. That decision was made after the board spent a full shift watching "Lone Ranger" episodes.

"When asked what {Kemosabe} meant, Tonto responded, 'Trusty friend,'" the board found. "Both the Lone Ranger and Tonto treat one another with respect...At no time during the episodes is the term Kemosabe ever used in a demeaning or derogatory manner."

The board added, however, that while Tonto was always treated respectfully, the long-popular TV show treated other Native American characters in a demeaning manner.

(I knew there had to be a "however" in there somewhere: too good to be true that sanity would prevail totally, even in the Great White {oops!} North! And of course, "Tonto" in Spanish still means "foolish" or "stupid." Just wait 'til the Latino Tsunami gets up there and the P.C. crowd forces trilingualism on 'em. Maybe that name and those meanings are what that airhead employee had in her "mind.")